Episode 12
by luannlullaby
Summary: What would happen if England had told the Allies about the question he heard Germany ask Italy and Japan in Episode 12? What would their responses have even been? How would it have gone down if America had a certain idea which could have had a somewhat significant consequence?


Episode 12

"What do you do when Britain comes up to you dressed in Carnivale and swishing his hips?"

Arthur had to run. That question was just too...horrifying. What in heaven's name could be going on in that German's head! Oh dear lord, he still had to tell the Allies about this little spy mission-gone wrong. Horribly, horribly wrong, mind you.

Oh god, there was nothing more humiliating than knowing what your enemy obviously views you as! Which in Arthur's case, it might as well be an exotic dancer. Who would have ever thought Ludwig could think such lewd things?

"Yo, Britain dude! How'd the mission go?" came the loud, obnoxious distinctly grating voice he knew far too well.

"Not now, Alfred. Besides, my mission was a bit on the off-putting side." he sighed as the disturbing question was being asked loud and clear in his memory.

Alfred's bright blue eyes widened, "Oh, so did they spot you? Ha! It'd be so funny of they did!"

The shorter blonde shuddered in fear of exactly what could have happened had he been caught. Oh he could see it now: skimpy, barely there, beaded thongs and a matching glittery bra.

Alfred's head tilted slightly to the side, "Iggy... Are you okay? You look like you've been fondled by France in your sleep again."

The green-eyed blonde responded quickly, a tell tale blush giving away his fib, "I was not fondled by France again and I did not hear anything sexually suggestive from Germany when I was doing my mission!"

"Oh. Did he say he wants to fuck you hardcore like a pornstar?"

"Watch your mouth, git! No, he did not say that!"

"Did he say he wants to fuck you till you can't walk or stand for two months?"

"N-No!"

"Did he say he has erotic, S&M wet dreams of fucking you while you're in a French maid or school girl uniform?"

Arthur's face was now flushed, knowing there was a good chance Germany actually thought that way of him, "What goes on through your thick, perverted skull?!"

Alfred froze, then slowly chuckled, "You...really don't wanna know."

Arthur snapped in annoyance, "It's 'want to' not 'wanna' and I heard Germany asking Italy and Japan what they would do if they saw me dressed in Carnivale, swishing my hips!"

A light bulb went off in America's head and whenever this happens (in spite how rare) it usually never means anything good.

"Oh bloody hell." the island nation muttered, now wishing desperately to have kept his mouth shut.

* * *

"Alright Allied forces, so it's settled! Iggy will end World War II by dressing up in the skimpiest Carnivale and swishing his little hips!"

China and Russia had chuckled when England himself told them about his failed mission. France (of course) was in the bathroom dealing with an urgent 'matter' once he overheard the news England told China and Russia.

Which led to the idea that since the Axis had no solution to dealing with a scantily lad, hip swishing England this could be a weakness for them. A weakness, which, if utilized correctly, could gain them victory in the war!

Yao nodded in agreement, "Yes, now England, go, aru! Get dressed up in the glitteriest, pinkest, girliest bra you own!"

Arthur was now flustered, "I don't own anything…like that!"

The three countries in the room (Francis had to leave early due to sexual tensions) were now staring at him in shock.

"Really?"

Arthur turned to face Ivan as he broke the silence, "Y-Yes really! What in god's name ever suggested otherwise?"

Ivan grinned his eerie grin as he went on to explain, "You hide a woman's curves under those baggy clothes! It's very obvious to everyone, da. I'm shocked you don't own anything pink, cute, or frilly. You would look pretty in it too, da."

Wide, stunned emerald eyes were staring at the Russian in part fear and part disbelief. The fact Russia thought this way of him was very, very discomforting to say the least.

China's only response was a quickly spoken: "He's right, Arthur. You are…curvier, aru. Like a tall, slim supermodel of sorts."

"Ha! Dude, I've seen you shirtless before; all you need is a rack and a pussy to be a full-blown chick!"

"…America, zip it."

"Oh! I have perfect clothes for you Arthur! You'll look really good, da~."

"Then it's settled! Iggy will save the world with my ingenious plan and his feminine body! Russia, you bring the clothes. China, you bring the shoes. As for me, I'll bring Iggy and a team of make-up artists to enhance his too girly features."

"I object to this!"

"Too late." all three nations said in perfect unison as they scurried off to get the 'supplies'.

'Oh bloody hell, I'm as good as screwed!' he thought in distress once everyone was gone.

* * *

Arthur was horrified at what he saw in the mirror. The reason he wears baggy clothes? To hide his unnaturally-narrow-for-a-man waist, his long, lean legs, and subtly curved hips. Overall, he looked like a mix between early 90s Kate Moss and Agyness Deyn.

Yet it was not his body shape that him horrified: no, it was the clothing he was currently in. A light blue, beaded panty of sorts made up his bottom and as for his top, he was in a fully jeweled, light blue bra that was connected to a necklace that turned into a choker around his neck. He wore a big, feathery neon blue headpiece and too high light gold heels. To make matters worse, America had his make-up artist make his face too feminine for his liking.

How was this accomplished? Well, let's just say that milky pink lipstick with a matching gloss on top along with matching blush and a light (yet sultry) grey smoky eye all made this hell come true.

"Hmm… Do you think this works, China?"

Yao furrowed his brows as he examined Arthur yet again, "I think it does, aru. Russia?"

Ivan was looking at the blonde with too creepy eyes while he answered, "Yes! Yes it does. Those Axis won't know what hit them!"

Arthur could have died from shame right on the spot.

"Well, you better get going Iggy and remember; swish your hips, not sway your hips!"

Only his so-called Allies would do this to him.

* * *

'Alright then, now I need to do it…no backing down.' he thought in hesistance as his emerald eyes caught sight of the target from his hiding spot.

Taking one final deep breath, Arthur got out of the wooded area and began to head over to the enemy.

-meanwhile with the Axis..

"You two never answered my question! This is an essential tactic to have on hand when dealing with Britain! What do you do when Britain comes up to you dressed in Carnivale and swishing his hips?"

Japan immediately responded, "I don't believe such a situation will ever occur. Britain is too proud to ever do such a thing."

Italy then cut of his ally with a peppy, "Oh, oh, oh I know! Get him drunk and take advantage of him!"

Germany sighed, "No Italy; you grab him by the hips and dominate him like the little submissive he is!"

Kiku only rolled his doe eyes slightly, "I don't believe such a thing will ever occur. He probably doesn't even know what sex is."

Then they all heard a sound of someone approaching them. Once they all turned to the direction where the sound came from, Kiku was left speechless (not to mention scarred, because this is his friend), Ludwig was left wide eyed as well as bit excited, and Feliciano was now gaping with open golden brown eyes.

Right in front of them was Arthur, walking right up to them, dressed in Carnivale, and swishing his hips.

Well...they didn't see that one coming.

Kiku was frozen in his spot, unsure of what to do, Feliciano was already getting out some alcohol, and Ludwig was left...twitching.

'Suddenly… Italy's idea doesn't seem so bad.' he thought as blonde got closer.

Arthur made the mistake of getting a step too close before Ludwig had him held down and was shouting, "Now Italy! Do it now!"

'Oh bloody hell I'm dead! Fuck you, Alfred!'

Instead of a brutal assaulted ending in his demise, Arthur could feel a bottle being shoved into his mouth and a burning liquid going down his throat.

As he drank more of the liquid he could feel himself losing hold of his thoughts and by the time it was out if his mouth, it was too late.

He was stumbling and as soon as he said, "Ah fuck! I can't-I can't stand! Fuck China and his damn heels, fuck Russia and this outfit, I'm takin' it all off!"

His vision was a bit blurred, but this increased when he moved too fast to take off the heels. Thus leading to him falling on the ground.

Ludwig was in a bit of disbelief at the sight, "Really…he didn't even drink half of the drink you brought."

Feliciano grinned widely, "See? Ve told you he's a lightweight!"

Kiku (at that moment) was snapped out his trance and ran over to Arthur, "Arthur, please take my jacket. You are in dire need of more clothes."

Arthur chuckled, "No I'm not! I need to get these... This atrocity off of me!"

"Arthur, no." the shorter, sober one whispered back as he tried to cover the blonde with his jacket.

Too late.

By the very second he was naked, Ludwig had him in his arms (bridal style) whilst he carried the smaller blonde away with Feliciano following suite.

Japan sighed, "Poor Arthur."

* * *

"Hello?"

"Hello America, this is Germany, I wanted to talk to you about Britain."

America fist pumped the air in joy and victory once he heard this over the phone. It worked! Ha, oh would Iggy be given the 'I told you so' of a lifetime!

He replied with a tad cocky, "Ah so you wanna talk about Iggy, huh? Okay; lay it on me, dude!"

"Yes, well we have decided that since we captured Britain we are going to keep him."

America could feel his face fall, then he rebounded back with a brilliant idea, "How about this: you end the war and you can keep Iggy! Trust me when I say it, but dude none of us will ever want him back from you, so it works perfectly!"

"Hmm, interesting proposal. I'll have to call my boss and see if he agrees with it. I will be calling later, America. Goodbye."

"Bye dude!"

America sighed in relief before jumping up and down in joy. Blue eyes sparkling with victory, he awaited the call.

When the phone rang back, Alfred practically ripped it off the wall, "Yo Germany dude, is this you?"

An irritated sigh was heard on the other line before the German spoke, "Yes, it is I. Listen, my boss disagreed to your proposal, but I am willing to make a deal with you."

"Sure! Name it!"

"We take over the rest of Europe as well as the rest of the world and leave China, Russia, America, and France alone if I get to keep Britain, no questions asked."

Alfred was never good with thinking things through fully.

"Sure, you have a deal! Don't worry, none of us will ever wanna save Iggy cause he's boring and I'm sure you'll take great care of him!"

"Um… Yes trust me he'll be in great care. Goodbye America, pleasure doing business with you."

"Don't mention it, you Nazi freak! Bye!"

Yes, Alfred was perfectly satisfied with this deal.

* * *

"Great news Allied forces! My plan worked!" he shouted triumphantly to the table of three countries.

"How did it work, America?" Russia asked.

America responded with a loud, victorious voice, "I made a deal with Germany saying that he could keep Iggy, dominate the rest of the world, and leave us Allies alone! Isn't this great?!"

Everyone was silent for a minute before France responded, "Ah well, as long as he leaves my country alone I am good."

China nodded then said, "Hmm yes I agree with France; as long as he leaves my country alone I'm fine with this deal, aru."

Russia soon added his two cents as well, "Yes true, I am good with this deal as well. Once Germany takes over, I'll wipe him off the planet and dominate England for myself!"

"So it's settled then? No more fighting the Axis and no more Nazi take over of our countries."

All three answered in perfect unison, "Agreed."

"Great! Meeting adjourned, bros! I have some waves to catch back in Cali."

Once America was gone out of the room, the other countries talked for a bit before heading out as well. Francis was the one who (unfortunately) had to deal with a little, annoying problem.

"Frog! Where's my big brother!"

Sealand.

Francis mentally groaned: why him?

"Well, you see he is with Germany now as a captive but we made a deal with him saying he could dominate the rest of the world, but leave China, Russia, America, and myself alone if he got to keep Angleterre. So we agreed to it just now."

Peter's blue eyes widened in rage, "You guys did what?! You all know Germany's a closet pervert! Why would you whore my brother out like that!"

Francis rolled his sapphire eyes, "Oh please! It's just Germany; he's a prude, he won't do anything to Angleterre."

* * *

Arthur was tied down to a bed, he was still naked, and alone with Ludwig.

"But Ludwig, I tied him up and came up with the idea! Why can't I have my fun first?" came the whine behind the now-locked door.

"Because he's my captive and I want to do some...things with him that are none of your business!" he shouted back to the Italian.

"Ve~ Ludwig, why can't I join? I am the country of fantastic lovers!"

"Because it's not in my original fantasy, now leave! You'll get your turn after me!"

A defeated sigh was heard before Italy replied, "Fine Germany; just don't break him too hard."

The moment he heard the Italian walk away, he got on the tied down blonde and began to kiss him passionately.

Yes, this was going to be a long night.

* * *

Peter Kirkland was officially livid.

In this moment of weakness, after two weeks had passed and he realized Arthur truly wasn't coming back, he unleashed every country's worst nightmare once he called up his other brother.

"What do ye want?" came the thick accent of his older brother.

"Scotland, this is Sealand! Listen, England's been caught by the Axis and the other countries agreed to let the Axis dominate the rest of the world, but spare China, Russia, America, and France from all domination if Germany got to keep England for good." the young child explained in one quick breath, "He's been gone for two weeks and I went over to Germany to spy on him and he's got Arthur, tied down to a bed, making strange noises."

The older country was silent for two minutes before replying in a death calm tone, "How did Arthur get caught by the Axis, Peter?"

"Well, it all started when Arthur went spying on the Axis during their training.. Germany asked them what would they do if they saw Arthur coming up to them, dressed in Carnivale and swishing his hips. So America got the great idea to dress Arthur up in Carnivale and have him swishing his hips as he approached the Axis, alone. That is why he got caught."

The other line was quiet for five minutes before Peter said, "…Hello? Scotland?"

"They're all dead."

The line went dead and Peter was left alone, wondering if he should've done this by himself all along.

* * *

A loud, angry slam on the door woke up Feliciano and sent him over to the door in a dazed state. The light auburn haired nation was now in front of the door and answered it with a yawn, "Hello?"

"Hello, chump. Is our wee brother here?"

Feliciano was instantly snapped out of his daze as he saw three angered nations standing before him. The one who spoke had dark red hair and green eyes, his eyebrows thick like Arthur's. The other one on the right had sandy brown, curly hair and despite being the same height as Feliciano, he was bigger built, muscular, and intimidating. He too had green eyes and thick eyebrows. The one on the left was only an inch shorter than the redhead who had spoke, he had coal black eyes, milky white skin, and thick, curly strawberry blonde hair. Though he did not have green eyes like the other two, he did have the same thick eyebrows.

All of three were bigger built than him, obviously more muscular than him, and their very presence made him want to cry.

Instead of an answer to his question, the redhead got a white flag waving about and a scared as hell Italian crying, "Please, please, please don't kill me! I surrender! I surrender! Please don't kill me, I'll give you anything you want, anything, anything!"

The redhead sighed in exasperation, "We're not here ta kill ye! We're here ta kill the German fuckin' our wee brother!"

This seemed to calm the coward down perfectly.

"Oh! So, you're here...to kill Ludwig? Ve~, why didn't you just say so? He's been hogging Arturo for the past two weeks even though I was the one who came up with the idea to get him drunk and take advantage of him!"

Wrong thing to say Italy.

"Shut up me boy! Don't give us a reason ta kill you! I'm Northern Ireland, the ginger is Scotland, and the wool head is Wales. Now, tell us where our brother is or else..." the strawberry blonde one (now known as Northern Ireland) yelled at the now terrified Italian, who had began waving his white flag once more.

"Great, now he's goin' to piss himself, North! I knew we should've brought South." the brunette known as Wales barked at his brother with a roll of his green eyes.

"Watch yer words, wool head." the coal eyed blonde threatened.

Scotland groaned, "Shut up the both of ye! Arthur is in danger, a Nazi is fuckin' him as we speak! Now, we need to find where our wee brother is, Italian, so tell us where the hell you're keepin' him an' you'll be spared."

Feliciano instantly nodded and began to lead the brothers into the home. They walked passed the kitchen and living room area, going up a flight of stairs. When up the stairs, they walked down a hall. At the end of the hall was a door. From behind the door, they could hear a voice speaking.

"Ah, Ludwig..."

The three brothers were now radiating a pitch-black aura as they listened closely to the door and the voices behind it.

"You know the Allied forces gave you up to me, right?"

"I know. I'm not shocked, but I heard you on the phone. I don't mind...being your captive."

North Ireland's eyes were wide with momentary shock, yet filled with worry, "Listen ta 'im! He's gone mad and lost his mind!"

Scotland now had a grave look upon his face, "Stockholm Syndrome… Don't worry, Iggy! Help is on the way! Wales, kick down the door!"

The brunette was now glaring down his brothers, "Are you makin' me kick down the doors cause you think I'm fat?"

The older two rolled their eyes in annoyance. Not this again, anything but this.

"No ye damn wool head! You're more muscular than us, you're the only one who can kick down the door, now kick it the fuck down! Arthur needs us!" the angered blonde ranted at his brother.

"...Fine, I'll kick it down."

The very moment the door was down the brothers were left in shock. Arthur—their cute albeit moody at times little brother—was cuddled up right by the German's side. Oh did they forget to notice he wasn't restrained to the bed anymore? Well...he wasn't, which meant he had been staying there of his own free will.

Something they could never accept.

The moment the taller blonde placed a kiss on his lips, the brothers had already flown off the rail.

"Hands off our brother, ye pervert!" Scotland yelled as he ran over to Ludwig, ready to nail him in the eye, whereas Wales had gone up to Arthur.

"C'mon Iggy, you're comin' home." the brunette said as he ripped his (naked) brother out of the bed.

Arthur's face was now flushed with embarrassment, "Dylan! I'm naked, I would need some clothing and besides, I like it here with Germany."

Northern Ireland wrapped a blanket around Arthur as he screamed out loud in pure panic, "He's ill! He's ill! I told ye he's ill! He needs ta come home now so they can cure him of German brainwashing!"

"Patrick, I was not brainwashed! I genuinely like Ludwig!" the younger blonde shouted back.

All three brothers froze to turn their attention to him.

Scotland then glared down Ludwig, "Ah, so I see what you've done... You've raped ma brother into submission! North, Wales, take Arthur an' leave! I'll deal with this one here."

"Ian, don't!" Arthur shouted as the two brothers began to man handle him out of the room, "Ian, please I had a crush on him before the war and I still do! Ian, Ian!"

The very second the three left the house Scotland turned his rage to the German nation.

"Any last words?"

"Tell Arthur I loved him."

* * *

"…And that kids is how World War II ended!" America said with a grin to the group of little kids.

"Bollocks, pure bollocks." the group mumbled amongst themselves as the American nation began to tell yet another story of the war...little did they know how accurate those stories (despite the faulty endings of victory) actually were.

(Authors's Note: Yes, I have gotten into Hetalia, it's something one of my newly made friends got me hooked on! I saw Episode 12 today and this is what came out of it! I hope I didn't make anyone too out of character and I hope I got the whole scenario right. Thank you to anyone who reads this, reviews it, favorites it, and follows it. Let's all hope you like it along with my strange sense of humor. Again, thank you :) )


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